Consulting Dr. Google

So last night while being bed ridden cause I'm as sick as a Chinese Maccas ad (So you're watching tv or telly, as us true aussies call it, and there are these adorable little, fluffy chicks running around and you just want to adopt them all and call yourself Mother Clucky Hen but the next screen folds over and it shows kids biting into nuggets. Like fml, what kind of advertising is this? Talk about Oops-I-didn't-think-this-through moments. Pet or snack, you decide. Sick, isn't it?! Actually the whole Chinese marketing industry just kind sucks, KINDA.) ...where was my original sentence, the insert was too long... Okay I got it. Well, about a bazillion blog ideas came to me and I felt so bloody enlightened and happy cause it was one of those moments where you can transform what is intangible and in your mind, to something as coloured text which you can share and come back to cause it's solid. But alas, no. I was too lazy (SICK) to get up and write any of it down, what a waste of brain juices. Far out, brussel sprout.

Anyways, I thought it would be nice morning conversation to discuss what's wrong with my body:

Fever has transformed into a cold, thank googly god.

Bleeding ear which I'm hoping is a minor infection or something..

Period pain and cramps, what a party.

Yesterday I was vomiting bile (I googled to find the term and to my horror), Bile is a composition of: water (85%), bile salts (10%), mucus and pigments (3%), fats (1%), inorganic salts (0.7%) and cholesterin (0.3%).

Main causes of vomiting bile:

Intestinal blockage    - this can sometimes lead to 'fecal vomiting' omg ew..

Gall bladder surgery  - WHAT?

Alcohol intolerance   -  Irrelevant, beyond irrelevant.

I kept on clicking the blue words on wikipedia...

It may lead to metabolic acidosis which is a condition that occurs when the body produces too much acid or when the kidneys are not removing enough acid from the body. If unchecked, metabolic acidosis leads to acidemia, due to increased production of hydrogen by the body or the inability of the body to form bicarbonate in the kidney. Its causes are diverse, and its consequences can be serious, including coma and death.

(I only read the bolded words which is sufficient methinks.)

OHMYDEATHBED, I'm exactly like Mother Clucky Hen, stuffed with disease and despair, about to die and going to be deep fried and seasoned for all you chicken lovers. I haven't even met my chicks who are probably nuggets smothered in sweet chilli sauce already, someone help me.

Okay, I need to get away from the computer, byebyeboooo.

P.S if you're really bored like me, click http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20110130143310AA4wqOA Everytime I feel stupid, I got to yahoo questions to see people who are more stupid, gosh it's entertaining.