Not XS!

Title makes it sound like I'm going to talk about fat and skinny people, but really I mean XS as in excess. (I'm not stupid/'simple', admit you find it entertaining toooooo.)

Monday          Uni
Tuesday         Possums
Wednesday    Possums
Thursday       Possums + LC

Friday             Uni

Saturday        LC

Sunday           LC/stocktake

I enjoy cramming my days & I don't know whether everyone is accustomed to living it easy, but why is it everyone thinks working full time hours and studying full time, is "crazy"? If you check out my routine above you'll realise I still have plenty of time for social gatherings (which totally happen, HAH) and me-time. I remember first experiencing this question in highschool where everyone with circular mouths and widened eyes would say "15 units?!" as though it were the worst thing in the world when really, I didn't feel like I was doing anything (but that could also be due to the reason I never feel like I'm doing anything). I feel encased in shame for no obvious reason. Shame on their behalves, I guess. I mean, if I gave you a mandarin slice and told you "This is a standard meal size", would you feel full?! Who's to say that working 40 hours and studying 20 is "too much"? Just because we know the standard of 40 hours is enough, it doesn't mean 50, 60, 70 is too much. If the standard were 18 hour shifts and 100 hour weeks, I may understand why we're complaining. But it's not. Everyday I feel like there is so much remaining time that is wasted, where I could be doing something else rather than..well, what I'm doing now, which is net surfing. See? Too much time, used too little. Not to say that net surfing and relaxing time isn't important. But are we giving ourselves too much of this? It's not like we're physically/mentally incapable of doing more.

Everyone seems to feel tired all the time. Why is this? Lack of sleep, or because we're so accustomed to spoiling ourselves? One long day at uni and we complain. One 8 hour shift and we complain. We have 24 hours to spend a day, we shouldn't be tired. I think it should be questioned how much of our time we are wasting, and whether we're tired at all. I mean I'm all for relaxing and do-nothing-days but everyone needs to stop complaining they're tired, stop feeling sorry for themselves and stop muttering jibberish about me "pushing myself". I'm not, I'm just doing what I think I'm perfectly capable of, and what I think everyone is perfectly capable of. If you don't think you are or can't be bothered to try then that's not my fault, don't compare me to you. If I'm tired then it's because I chose to sacrifice sleep because I decided waiting to bid on ebay at 3am was more important, but that was my decision. Physical time is never an issue. Also, just want to mention I blame hillsbus for wasting 20%+ of my daily conscious life, so unrelated but any chance to complain about hillsbus is a chance I will seize gladly.

We have to value time the way we value money (the notes, not coins!). We need a new level of tiredness. Right now, the whole world's neutral level seems to rest at tiredness (rest at tiredness..hehe geddit?!) so it really doesn't count. We're told we're tired but we're not! We're normal, we're fine! I don't want to hear this particular conversation template anymore:

A: I'm so tired! Worked like, two days in a row.
B: Me too! Far out, and we have an exam soon.
A: Feel sorry for me, I only got 3 hours sleep!!
B: Nooo, feel sorry for me moreeee! I got zero!

A&B: blablablabllablablblablblablblbalblblabla!

& cause I haven't taken photos of my face in a while, here's me looking 'tired' with this special card thing matthew made me. He's got the mental capacity of a teenager. Clever, clever.
"the pink teddy is just so soft, you can touch it."
"this is a pretty jewel and it's so beautiful. you can give it to your mum."
"I'll write my name in big and little letters" (Writes a lopsided 'E') "The 'E' is falling over!"

My wall is beginning to look like a scrapbooker's rubbish bin. :)

 I think everyday I wake up I feel a little luckier but I'll save that for another post. Okay, time to make some green tea. Boyyyyyyyy.

How my money shall dwindle away.

With financial year sales 'round the corner holding my heart on fishing lines, and the understanding that some of my tax money is running its way back to me, I'm quite prepared to chuck some of it back to the economy. Also, got to use one of my new favourite words - dwindle! So Veri Nais.

Ever since I discovered Billy Bride, I've become obsessively attached to mineral rocks. This lady travels the world to hunt for pieces of mineral rock/crystals she loves, then with a crafty mind, crafty hands and crafty machinery no doubt, she makes purty, purty jewellery. My favourite is ISKA, and it almost sounds like part of my name, heck it's how most of the 'people' from work pronounce my name (1-3 year olds mostly) it's also $345 and sold. (I love it when people name inanimate objects, I guess that's half the reason why I like IKEA so much.) So yes, sold, do you hear my tears? whooooooosh!

 

Her blog is lol, lolly, lollipop.
http://www.billybride.net/2011/05/people-who-have-ruined-my-life-pt-1.html

Also. Just want to sprout a little sadness here. In memory of borders and all the book shops in australia. For them to all be closing down really says something about our society. What is going to happen when noone reads books anymore? But anyway...I'm secretly pleased, going to skip over there tomorrow and inherit the lot. Hello sexy sales! Once again, just gonna say a little hypocrisy is okay, mhmm.

Goodbye little ones. I have cake and coffee waiting for me. I realise it's not 3pm in the arvo, but I have permitted myself to drink myself coffee and for the past week it's been fine but today I started getting tremors and my fingers jerked so hard my iphone fell on the floor (yeah, gross), so I have to get the most out of it before I ban myself again/my whole body jerks like that and I die. Also, the cake is so good, it's like a brownie with as many macadamias as there are chinese people in the world, and we all know macadamias are one of the most consistently good things in the world. So bye friands, I'm going to get coffee drunk, eat sugar and fat, and laugh and cry and feel very fulfilled with life cause I have a copy of 'The Last Samurai' which sounds like a typical Japanese fighting hero ninja sushi book, or relevant to the movie with Tom Cruise, but my friends, it is not, IS NOT!

& I have no work tomorrow which makes me feel uneasy but I'll be playing at parra borders tomorrow so if you're there tell me! (Unless I don't like you...jokety jokes, not not, hot pot.)

Byeboygirl!

Also, wanna hear an interesting fact?
I spat into test tubes to earn $30. What can I say, my saliva is valuable.

Sharing cause I'm nice.

What I can't stop listening to today:



I don't know why humans seem to think dinosaurs go well with music, and are groovy, groovy dancers (Dorothy the dinosaur too!) but it works for me. Dedicating this to a sad little boy, Ross.

 This makes me cry, then I decided to read the comments - "They're all so mother(beep)ing ugly." hate those youtubers...

This is like listening to happinness. & if you want to know, the comments on this video are something I approve of. "I thought I was hearing my own heartbeat, but it turns out it's just the song." DAMN RIGHT. "I could listen to this everyday.. just dont tell my black friends that." HAHA, fun knees.

 
"GOOD GAWD!" This song's ability to get stuck in your head like gaga does is pretty awe-striking. All those times you heard me murmuring 'drip drop can't stand the rainnnnnnnnnn', yep it wuz zis! These talented people were on glee :D



You're right, right, right. This is amaze-me-ful.

"we sure are cute for two ugly people", I should watch Juno again.

Sometimes I try to be overly ambitious and attempt to read something great and listen to explosions in the sky or the intuition at the same time, I think it's to do with the lack of lyrics, and all that raw sound unleashes this need for me to find the words that can mould what I feel into something I can tell other people/myself about, but nope, impossible. & it's also literally impossible to do those two things at once, or to recieve either without feeling like you could burst into an explosion of liquid chocolate and chilli and all the flavours of the spice palate. It's like when you're in an interview and they say 'describe yourself in 3 words', and I want to be like, don't kid yourself, you sit here with me for a year and then you'll naturally understand. Except it doesn't matter how many years, those words don't exist. It's like the way I describe my baby/marriage obsession in words like "really cool!" and "babehs cute!" and "i want a dozen!". Somehow some people (about 4/so really..) do understand the extent to which I feel about these things, I don't know how it managed to come across but I am so grateful cause I feel like I can only ever tell people what things are not, never what they are.

The discovery of the hole in my pocket.

GOODREADS, I BLAME YOU FOR SEDUCING ME TO RAID BOOK DEPOSITORY, EBAY AND AMAZON AND BORDERS AND ALL THAT LOVERLYDOVERLY STUFF CAUSE I JUST BOUGHT 9 BOOKS TONIGHT, AND THERE IS NO ROOM ON MY BOOKSHELF TO MAKE THEM LOOK PRETTY, AND THIS JUST KEEPS HAPPENING AND HAPPENING AND HAPPENING AND NOW I FINALLY REALISE WHERE ALL MY MONEY HAS GONE!!!!!!! BORDERS, DON'T YOU GIVE ME THAT I'M-SO-SAD-AND-AM-DYING-SO-YOU'RE-DOING-A-GOOD-THING LOOK, DON'T YOU DO THAT YOU LITTLE WEENER SAUSAGE FRANKFURT MAN. Blah.

I'm really, really, really, really excited, as excited as I would be if you gave me a part of a baby. Check it out, I even got classics! Yahooooooogoogle!

Room - Emma Donoghue
The Catcher in the Rye - J.D. Salinger
Your Memory - Kenneth L. Higbee
Tinkers - Paul Harding
Great Expectations - Charles Dickens
The Myth of Sisyphus - Albert Camus
Pale Fire - Vladimir Nabokov
The History of Love - Nicole Krauss
Nausea - Jean-Paul Sartre
A Short History of Nearly Everything - Bill Bryson
The Alchemist - Paulo Coelho (I listened!)

If you're wondering why there's 11 not 9, it's cause I bought two more while typing this blog, it's like an ILLNESS. Also, if you decide to visit book depository, the 'watch people shop' feature is so cool. I've been staring for the last 20 minutes. SOMEONE IN BELGIUM BOUGHT TREE OF CODES 32 MINUTES AGO! Gonna travel there and marry him/her/whatever.

Also, can you believe this is the real title of a book?!

How to be the Best Bubblewriter in the World Ever.

*illustration above is from 'The Flower' - John Light. Discovered this treasure at kiddycare, love-a-dove-above!

The world sucks.

http://www.theworldsucks.org/category/science/

Woohoooooooo, another site to waste my life on. I love stupid sites, love love love. If you're wondering how I found this site, I googled 'the world sucks' to see what would come up. I imagined hillsbus timetables which are the biggest liars in the whole wide world of suck. "LET'S REDUCE WORLD SUCK". Also, ignore that little advertorial of a woman holding glass bottles where her breasts used to be. Now you all wanna look, huhhhhh. Dirty people, dirty dirty people.

Day 27.

Your fashion style.

So I completely forgot about my themed bloggy month. Well anyway here's the trail of weak attempts continuing..

First of all, LOL fashionstyle. I know more about polar bear fur than I do about clothes and shoes and all that crap that tangles easy and how they're supposed to compliment eachother. I choose what I wear the same way I choose the books I read, or the music I listen to...completely by level of entertainment and comfort. Sometimes I wonder if a part of me can in fact dress myself, but there's no point cause I'll choose wearing my cat jumper or my giraffe print shirt or my abundance of maxi dresses complete with mismatched cardigans cause it's fun and I don't like showing my arms. I don't like clothes that resemble clothes, I like optical-illusion-providing prints and rough tassles and sparkly sequins and ditsy floral prints and mesh inserts and fluffy parts and huge ass buttons and ashamedly, fur and massive holes and families of pockets and random things you can play with. I never really feel an urge to buy clothes, well I do, in fact right now I do, but when I look at clothes, I don't see anything I want. I just want to touch them all because textures get me excited. I dislike clothes the way Phoebe dislikes pottery barn, cause furniture should have a story and so should clothes, we shouldn't be allowed to all own the same thing, it's hacking at what could've been something interesting. Not to say clothes have to be all old and gross and sharing that musty, ancient people smell with the world, but it shouldn't be mass produced, in fact, nothing much should be. But anyway, I don't LOVE clothes, except if we were to make a mixture of 3 tops, a pair of shoes, a rug and a child's toy, mhmm, now we're talking.

When I put in effort, I look like I haven't and instead, had rolled into vinnies, tried on the first 5 things I saw then rolled out onto the street. I've never really owned basics but I am growing to appreciate them! I wear my mum's stuff and my dad's...sometimes my brothers. They never fit me properly but it's either warm or comfortable or has a perfect sleeve length and that's good enough! I don't know, there's something about wearing other people's clothes that is so much more satisfying than wearing your own. I think ever since I dropped out of my fob phase, I just lost track and didn't have particular things I liked. 

Things I currently want (that are not really relevant to fashion at all):
Phoenix sweater - a slouchy & ridiculously comfy sweater with a PHOENIX cause itz mad yo
Asos sheer twilight blouse w/ dipped hem (It looks like the item below but in shirt form)
Black Milk Galaxy leggings - imagine, where's the universe? ON MY LEGS.
Princess diana's weddings dress - I could probably push people over with that dress.
Eyeball jewellery - Yeah, working on moving to America so I can buy zem!
Zara blazer with elbow patches - It's nice :) and my comment = interesting.
Gleek hoodie, 'Bazinga' hoodie, Anything w/ Friends - I would literally wear these everyday.
Mineral rock rings! Nature on my knucles!

Socks - I don't own any plain white socks, my favourite rainbows&sheep ones keep peeking.

If it helps at all, I appreciate fashionable people, watching them makes me happy! But I won't ever never ever be one of them. That 'sokay though, comfort is cool, not really, definitely not but whatever, I has sunnies and I am a kewlz emoticon. & I had the decency to refuse a pair of UGG knock offs complete with massive pom poms from mother dear earlier today. I have standards y'know....hah jookeeeeeeeeeeeesssssssssssss. 

3am oopety doops, g'morning :)

Topic jump!

I love topic jump, it's definitely my favourite way to blog cause I have attention issues. If I were a teacher I'd be the type to start talking about Module 1 then somehow end on interpretive dancing and how when I close my eyelids, I see these glowing veins on the back of my eyelids.

Turritopsis nutricula
It's a potentially immortal jellyfish. IT JUST KEEPS LIVING, read about it on wiki. It's pretty cool. Yep, I think big bang theory is having it's influence on me.

Karl Pilkington
I want to crawl inside your brain and just watch & watch & watch. Do something for yourself and youtube him. I can't stop laughing at "the man with the roundest head in the world", I feel so connected. There should really be more people like this in the world. His thought pattern just doesn't make sense, I bet his brain doesn't even look like a brain but like this massive blob of jelly with bits of flower petals and fluffy things and coloured string sticking out and gosh, it's fascinating. If I could talk to one person for the rest of my life, I think I'd choose him.

Let them go

Today my grandma spent 320 yuan on 20 kilos of fish from the markets, she then went to a lake?river?... body of water and released them all. What a champ.

Monster

Headphones either work on some people or don't, you either look cool or stupid, and although I'm more the latter I decided to go with it anyway. Got the studios and they cost me an arm and a leg..but don't look at me like that, it's a long term investment! I feel like I wouldn't do these kids justice though, I need rap and r&b or something, something that screams BASS BASS BASS and not 'twirl, my pretty'. Anyways, you know the sound aeroplanes make? Like this fuzzy, constant, lacking-in-oxygen-reminding buzz? I get that with noise cancelling, and when I think of aeroplanes, I get nauseated. So they're not happening, man I suck.

Best HOMOsapien ever
I think buying the F.R.I.E.N.D.S boxset reflects that my decision making skills have heightened to a whole new level. It's probably one of the best things I've ever done for myself, YAY, I can't stop watching. Phoebe, Phoebe, I wish you were real. Read all her lyrics pleasekthanks - http://www.livesinabox.com/friends/phoebesongs.shtml

Night354q1mare

Had a nightmare where all the possible letter combinations have literally RUN OUT, so we've resorted to adding numbers to our language. & we all sound like stats textbooks...omggggg, frightening.

Samurai Stories
"His head lay on the pillow, face as I had seen it, skull encasing a sleeping brain; how cruel that we must wake each time to answer to the same name, revive the same memories, take up the same habits and stupidities that we shouldered the day before and lay down to sleep."

A line of ants.

I DON'T LIKE IT WHEN PEOPLE I LIKE, LIKE PEOPLE I DISLIKE CAUSE THEN I END UP DISLIKING EVERYBODY.

Yes I've said it before, but I'll keep saying it as long as it keeps happening. It's like, oh hey decent person is close with shit person, which means there is something inherently shit about decent person to make them be able to be close with shit person, therefore decent person is contaminated by shit and transforms into yet another shit person. So anyway, decent people of the world, I don't care if you know shit person IS indeed a shit person, it matters that you do someting about it. Man up and walk away or go bite your fingernails in another cubicle where I can't see you, ever. Social obligations are silly, we shouldn't have to be polite when we don't want to be. And if you somehow know shit person is shit but still find that they're a sparkly angel sometimes, then obviously something's wrong with you, and we can't be friends. I don't want to hear someone/shit person is an"annoying and stuck up" loser who also has a "sweet, personable character", it just gets me really confused and angry, MAKE UP YOUR MIND, either stop pretending to like, or dislike them. You can't have both you greedy cake lovers. 

I'm so glad it's basically winter. My 4 blankets actually stay on me, and my new electric blanket isn't so useful cause it's hardly producing enough warmth to cuddle a koala, but it'll do. Bring on the mittens! They should find a way for people to be able to type and turn pages and not write like a 2y.o when wearing mittens. I know that's why we have gloves but I don't like gloves as much. & I've actually been writing blogs everyday but blogger had all these cookie and accessibility issues going on. What's a cookie, in the internet context? I kept refreshing the home page until it let me sign in... Also, I'm craving pumpkin soup but there's no pumpkin at home cause dad thinks pumpkins are satan, but somehow pork floss and peanut butter sandwiches are not... KEVJUMBAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!

Words Aptly Spoken (1995).

I really like this.

The paradox of our time in history is that we have taller buildings but shorter tempers; wider freeways, but narrower viewpoints. We spend more, but have less; we buy more, but enjoy less. We have bigger houses and smaller families; more conveniences, but less time. We have more degrees but less sense; more knowledge, but less judgment; more experts, yet more problems; more medicine, but less wellness. We drink too much, smoke too much, spend too recklessly, laugh too little, drive too fast, get too angry, stay up too late, get up too tired, read too little, watch TV too much, and pray too seldom. We have multiplied our possessions, but reduced our values. We talk too much, love too seldom, and hate too often. We've learned how to make a living, but not a life. We've added years to life not life to years. We've been all the way to the moon and back, but have trouble crossing the street to meet a new neighbor. We conquered outer space but not inner space. We've done larger things, but not better things.We've cleaned up the air, but polluted the soul. We've conquered the atom, but not our prejudice. We write more, but learn less. We plan more, but accomplish less. We've learned to rush, but not to wait. We build more computers to hold more information, to produce more copies than ever, but we communicate less and less. 

These are the times of fast foods and slow digestion; big men and small character; steep profits and shallow relationships. These are the days of two incomes but more divorce; fancier houses but broken homes. These are days of quick trips, disposable diapers, throwaway morality, one night stands, overweight bodies, and pills that do everything from cheer, to quiet, to kill. It is a time when there is much in the showroom window and nothing in the stockroom. A time when technology can bring this letter to you, and a time when you can choose either to share this insight, or to just hit delete. 

Fruity Fruit.

I always want to eat an apple until I eat it, then I want to chuck it away.
I never want to eat an orange until I've had some, then I want to eat 50 dozens of them.

It's all the medias fault, with the ads and movies and photos and whatever promoting apples to be this amazing goddess of a fruit when really, more than half the time it's not hard enough, or it's too sandy, or the skin is too thick or it just tastes funny. And what does the orange get? My mind skips to worms in orange juice (Poor mahzah) and the annoying talking orange, gross.

I don't know why I felt like this was blog worthy but it's typed up already..

Talk to the hand.

facebook groups; I don't like them anymore cause they make my facebook look messy but gosh they're funny. I'm going to copy and paste a bunch here, because I have nothing better to do at 1:30AM. Yeah, I corrected some of the grammar, ya gotta do what ya gotta doooooo (perfect english right there).

Periods late...haven't had sex...I must be carrying the next baby Jesus!

The awkward moment when wikipedia has copied your homework.

I received a blank text from my wife the other day. When I got in from work I asked "Why did you send me a blank text?"  "Because I'm not talking to you."

Waiter : Hello, would you like a table?
You : Nah mate, we booked the floor.

When I see an argument on Facebook, I sit there refreshing the page whilst thinking to myself "THIS IS GONNA BE GOOD!"

Sibling Property Rules
If I like it, its mine.
If im holding it, its mine.
If i can take it from you, its mine.
If i had it a little while ago, its mine.
If im chewing something up, all the pieces are mine.
If its mine, it must never appear to be yours anyway.
If it it just looks like mine, its mine.
If you are playing with something and you put it down, it automatically becomes mine.
If its broken, its yours.

I decided to burn some calories today, so I set a fat kid on fire.

Martin Luther King: I have a dream...
Leonardo DiCaprio: Oh yeah? I had a dream in a dream in a dream.

Saw a piece of shit on the ground today, reminded me of you.

I will only stop loving you when a mute guy tells a deaf guy that a blind guy saw a legless guy walk on water.

HOW TO MAKE YOUR PARENTS THINK YOU'RE INSANE
Follow them around the house everywhere
Moo when they say your name
Run into walls
Say that wearing clothes is against your religion
Jump off the roof, trying to fly
Hold their hand and whisper to them, I see dead people
At everything they say yell, Liar
Stand over them at four in the morning with a huge grin on your face and say, good morning sunshine
Wear a sticker that says, "I'm a retard"
Try to swim in the floor

The real danger of chewing gum at school isn't being caught by your teachers, it's being caught by your friends.

 

My sister walks in my room. She has one pillow tied to her front and one to her back.
I ask, "What on Earth are you doing?"
Her reply was..."This pillow on my back, is to protect me, from the friends that will back stab me. And the front one, that's for the boys that will break my heart." She's 6.

I'm the kind of person who stops the microwave at 1 second just to feel like a bomb defuser.

 

Yo, 90's kids, remember when...
- Everybody owned a pair of light up sneakers?
-Hey Arnold and Full house were the best shows ever?
- "Talk to the hand" said it all?
-The ultimate comeback was "Well why don't you just marry it?"
- Almost every sentence was finished with the word "NOT!"
- When you learned the planets in school pluto was one of them?
- All movies came out on VHS?
- The rugrats were the shizz?
- you took plastic cartoon lunchboxes to school?
- Mr. Rodgers was the coolest man alive? 

 

Really excited about bringing 'talk to the hand' back.

Fickle jelly.

"It's not that I don't like people. It's just that when I'm in the company of others - even my nearest and dearest - there always comes a moment when I'd rather be reading a book."

-Maureen Corrigan

Exactly. 

Sitting here freezing, bopping to 'Kids' (MGMT), how I love this song, which reminds me, there are times I'd rather sit by myself and listen to my beloved tunes than talk with people. But in relevance to books, I managed to convince myself to buy 'The Old Curiosity Shop' by Dickens, and I think Ext. 2  back in highschool scarred me way too deep, I can't enjoy classics anymore, or the language used anyway. Sure it's sweet and interesting once you get used to it, but it takes too long. TEXTUAL DYNAMICS, how I love the way you screw with me, with your gimmicky crap and nonsense scribble. Everyone should watch 'Orlando' (Sally Potter), best movie ever. Anyway, I bought 'The Office' (UK version of course!) and it's the most awkward thing I've ever seen, I roves it.


Gareth: "One word, 2 syllables. DEMARCATION. He put my stapler inside the jelly again."
David: "Why's he done that?"
Gareth: "Told him once I don't like jelly, don't trust the way it moves."

DAY 4 (6)

A song that makes you cry.

I didn't feel like answering DAY 4/5 so here's DAY 6. I'm allowed to swap it around...

So anyway, nothing in particular strikes me but maybe 'I am the Walrus' because it reminds me of Oskar's dad which of course reminds me of Oskar who always makes me cry whether that be out of sadness or whatever emotion his strange little mind makes me feel. It also reminds me of 9/11 because of the obvious (well, it's obvious to me), and well, death is something that makes my eyes rainy, and death reminds me of poverty, slavery, disease (a 3rd world country in a nutshell) and having nothing in the world and everything being terrible, which brings us back to Oskar's father and how I will eventually lose my par-..um, I really don't want to finish the sentence, you get my drift and I can't believe I just used that phrase, I've never been able to blend that into a sentence without mocking the shits out of it but yeah, I did it. Side tracked, but everything sad just suddenly hold hands and you tumble into this snowball of sadness and that's basically what Foer does to me. Songs don't make me so sad, maybe because I generally listen to boppy, happy tunes that allow me to skip the whole emotional dementia. & there's a really pure child's voice talking at the end of the song, and that makes me pre-panic for if I were actually barren, and no children is just..beyond sad. I would invent my own Kong Kong. Also, death reminds me of post death which is still confusing for me, I don't know what to think and that makes me, what I would usually call 'angry' but really, I mean sad, because it's sad to know nothing.

Polyphasic Sleep?

Read this article now, go!
http://www.highexistence.com/alternate-sleep-cycles/

I'm considering experimenting with the everyman cycle. More time > Risk of health. I'm going to download that iphone app that someone once told me about (I don't remember who, but thank you) where it detects when is the end of your REM cycle aka the best time to wake you, and then ..it wakes you (yep, best sentence ever) and instead of feeling like you have a truck attached to your head, you wake up fresh and alert. Also, apparently once you become more developed and start with shorter naps and the like, you can experience LUCID DREAMS. Dreams where you remain completely conscious, where you have a sense of control, where you can do whatever you want in your own dimension of reality and once you've woken up, the memory appears as clear as ever. Gasp. Also, I always thought that 7 hours a night was such a waste of time given we only have 24 hours, so instead what about 3 hours of sleep?! Imagine what you could do in your extra timeee. It'd be amazing, I could allocate uni work to day time and cert 3 stuff to night time and well, do whatever I want. Or.. I could watch the whole 10 seasons of friends in like, 2 days or less! Also the dream thing, did I mention that? LUCID DREAMS. It's like unconscious meets subconscious meets consciousness. Hello, yes I'm in love with the idea. You'll be walking along and suddenly brain goes "Oh hey, I'm dreaming, I realise I'm dreaming, I'm STILL dreaming." and then you'll be like "Okay..so I wanna be a really hairy Harry Potter and eat a candied gremlin" and then.. YOU DO.  It's like in 'The Invention of Lying' where he invents the 'lie' (yes, surprise!) and he can do whatever shit he wants cause noone knows what a lie is. It's a hilarious movie by the way, watch it, well maybe not if you're boring and overly religious. Kay, abrupt ending cause I'm in a rush to get back to reading more about this. bye! 

In the Bin!

"Osama bin laden is dead. So is a woman who was killed in the firefight, taken by Bin laden's people as a human shield. I want to know her name, I want the whole world to know her name, so at any point we think we can celebrate a death, we're reminded that no matter how much we justify it, the inevitable consequence of violence is sadness, pain, misery and loss."

- Van Badham.

I don't know if celebrating the death of a human being is more ethically wrong or right (given his crime) but watching the millions of lines of writing bursting their outlines with a source of triumph, of justification, of righteousness and happiness, all over the internet...makes me so uncomfortable. Of course his murder and it is a murder, doesn't even nearly account for the lives lost but can we really celebrate death? As a symbolic gesture perhaps, but what are millions of Americans celebrating? That war will continue? Haven't all these deaths taught us a life for a life is wrong? Who can see the victory between all that blood and death? His death means nothing and will change nothing. Oh(eyes and ears and mouth and)nose :'(

DAY 3.

About your friends

This one's a tad strange. Anyway.

My friends are this group that don't seem to have the inherent need to ...contact each other. We seem to run around for weeks, sometimes months before we finally realise that we kinda miss eachother. It's pretty odd. And after a long awaited congregation of gossip and giggles, we'll continue on making do with those who are related to our jobs and uni lives and anything as a result of convenience, until we realise again that we don't remember what eachother look like. We're not a particularly tight knit group but we acknowledge that we're all there when need be. We don't have much friends out of the group to 'compensate' for our lack of contact but we all seem pretty content. Other than 'the group', all my friends are stand alone from eachother, they're all bits of this and that and together they'd make a very ugly patchwork. I don't know that I'm too reliant on my friends, there's never been too many situations that call for it. But that being said, we do value eachother. We're mostly the type to have a super complicated screening process in picking friends. We don't get close to people easily so we hold onto eachother knowing we're not perfect, knowing we annoy eachother but also knowing that it isn't easy but we're always here for eachother.

DAY 2.

The meaning behind your name.

My name is pretty boring, it's hebrew for 'The Wealthy One'. Precious stones and gold blocks and crispy notes! It apparently also means 'He sees', which first appeared in 'Merchants of Venice'. Shake-a-shake-a-shakespeare.

My parents thought it would be fun to name one kid, mainstream and the other, outcast. I'm Jessica and my brother's name is Kingsley. I've only ever come into contact with that name once, Kingsley Shacklebolt from Harry Potter...

Also Jessica can be used as a surname, DID YOU KNOW THAT?

DAY 1.

5 interesting facts about yourself

This is way too hard, I'm not interesting enough.

1. I used to be part of this Chinese drama club for about a decade. I still can say that besides my time at childcare, that period of time made me ridiculously happy. We did reenactments of random plays and the like. With ugly masks of makeup, costumes with too much stretch and a strange mix of people, we memorised lines of messy chinese writing and flailed and wailed on stage. My most glorious moment was when I was the bitchy old lady who got shot by a bunch of hungry, rebellious kids, I had to grab my own ass and scream on stage.

2. I'm a different person when I'm speaking Chinese, as though when my mouth starts saying 'lah!' I have to start being different and thinking different. I think I become my mother actually. The moment I speak Chinese I feel my inner fob shining away, and when I speak English, I want to flush all the fobs down the toilet. It's as though my Chinese and English speaking personas are my subconscious and conscious and rather than fighting, they coexist quite perfectly. I don't know if it's because my grasp of the Chinese language doesn't permit me to express myself any differently but I don't think it is that completely; it sometimes feels like a mild bipolar disorder.

3. I have had this recurring dream for most of my life. I know dreams aren't very interesting cause it's the equivalent of saying "I READ A BOOK AND SOMEONE TOTALLY DIED" (given the person isn't dumbledore) but deal with it, kids. Anyways, I'm in this room, well not really a room but an area of just open space, it's completely black and I have this source of light which I can control. Someone is talking but it's my own voice and I don't recognise it but when I'm conscious I do. A gigantic image reveals a photo of someone's face and I have to state their name, if I fail to remember, the person in the photograph dies. This continues on for a few faces, all these people were once part of my life that I had at one point been close to, but now are somehow condoned to this strange fate completely reliant on my memory, which I gotta say, sucks. My family is never included. It's all pretty depressing. Sometimes I catch myself playing this 'game' while I'm conscious which leads me to read my facebook friends list repeatedly, y'know, just in case? Some of you have died a few times...I don't know if it works like Mario and you have a heap of lives because some faces (even after they've died) keep returning.

4. If there's one movie that I have always been terrified of, and still haven't watched completely, it's Alice in Wonderland and yes... I know it's a cartoon. I don't know if it's because I felt like Carroll's mind was completely contaminated or the fact that the cheshire cat and the tweedle twins made me want to cuddle the monster under my bed but something felt wrong. Something was always very haunting about it, it made me uncomfortable. & when I learnt in later years that he was a child porn enthusiast and drug affected, it seemed to fit right. I still haven't tried to watch it properly. Also, in your spare time, read up on hynopompic experiences, apparently that was Carroll's main source of inspiration. That part is interesting, promise.

5. I am obsessed and fascinated by the construct of marriage, I feel like if I had to choose a definition for happinness, I would sum it up with something like 'MARRIAGE AND BABEHSSS'. Marriage isn't just a piece of paper, it means so much more. It means that you've finally found that one person in your life. & babies....... need I say more? I'm so traditional. YESBABIES&MERRIMENT.